The Platinum Rule

The Platinum Rule

What’s That?

The Platinum Rule is simple: Treat others the way they want to be treated. I obsessed over the Platinum Rule while I was writing my first book, Become Your Own Bliss.  So much so, that I dedicated an entire chapter to explaining it and the various scenarios it should be employed. It occurred to me that although we humans desire the same basic things in life – nourishment, companionship, and security; the way we approach everything else varies depending on each person.

We are complex creatures with simple needs, but things become more complicated when it comes to interpersonal interactions. For example, I’m a bit of an emotional masochist because I’m enamored with the truth. Give me your truth – the truth about life, love, and the world. I want all of it, even if it hurts. If I have snot hanging out of my nose, I expect you to tell me if you don’t have a tissue handy. If my haircut makes me look like a mushroom, let me know! Don’t tell me that the cat next door went to a farm when she actually ended up in kitty heaven. It hurts, but I require honesty.

There are some people who avoid the truth at all costs. They literally can’t handle the truth and they run away – as far away as they possibly can so that they don’t run the risk of facing themselves. I would never tell this type of person that they have company in their face caves, because the embarrassment wouldn’t be worth the reward. I remember a former coworker who was this way: she got irritated with me for handing her a tissue when I told her to handle her bats.

Every Experience is Valid

I’m by no means invalidating the polite principle known as the Golden Rule which in case you’ve forgotten is Treat people the way you want to be treated, but I am gently reminding you, my Beautiful reader, that discernment is necessary. The Golden Rule applies to basic decency like respect begets respect, and if you don’t want sand thrown in your eyes, then maybe don’t start throwing sand. The Platinum Rule requires empathy, love, and setting aside one’s ego.

Beyond that, it’s ego-centric to believe that others want to be handled the same way as I do. Another example belies in my openness to correction: when I mess up, I want to be corrected (in a constructive way). I know someone who clams up every time there’s a correction directed his way. OK, then, keep making the same mistakes again. Alas, we must meet people where they are.

The Platinum Rule validates every experience. This means being sensitive to someone else’s quirks and emotional needs shouldn’t be too much of a chore, it only takes combination of empathy, consideration, and observation. Not difficult at all.

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